What's the atmosphere you create for the people around you with your presence?

Every room you walk into, you change the air. As a leader, your presence affects your team whether you notice it or not. Even the way you walk in and look at people is shaping the environment around you.

Constriction

We've all been around leaders, parents and coworkers who create an atmosphere of constriction. You can feel it because every atom in your body is begging to get out of it.

The air in the room is thin, it feels hard to breathe. Everyone is on edge, and nothing original or new is being created. People are constantly editing what they're going to say. They aren't speaking honestly. They say what they think you want to hear, not what they believe.

It's the atmosphere where teams and companies suffocate.

Expansion

And we've been in rooms and around leaders where we literally feel like we're expanding. The air is rich, it's nourishing. There's oxygen in it. People breathe easier and deeper. You feel safe enough to think out loud. To test new ways of doing things. To disagree. To challenge ideas. To bring new ideas to the table.

That kind of atmosphere brings out parts of people that disappear when they feel guarded, small, or judged.

So, which atmosphere are you creating when you walk into the room? Not which one do you intend to create. Which one are you actually creating on a Tuesday afternoon when you're tired, behind on email, your wife needs something from you, and you're walking into your fourth meeting of the day?

That's the version that matters because that's the atmosphere your team experiences most often, and that's the atmosphere they're adapting to.

How your team shows up is often less a reflection of who they are at their best, and more a reflection of what your presence is bringing into the room. Some leaders draw out the most creative, thoughtful, alive parts of people. Others, often without realizing it, cause those parts to recede.

So I'll ask again, which atmosphere are you creating, most consistently, with your presence?

It's a Way of Being

The most impactful leaders I have ever been around have all created an atmosphere where people come alive. You could say they cultivate the conditions for flourishing.

I bet the same is true for the leaders you remember. You'll never forget what it felt like to be around them. You remember what being in their presence opened up in you. They probably still shape the way you think and lead, even if you haven’t seen them in years.

The atmosphere is created by their way of being. Your way of being is not what you hope it is or what you say it is. It’s what people actually experience when they’re with you.

The atmosphere you create is your leadership. You can have the clearest strategy in the world but that strategy won't get executed if your team is suffocating under your presence. In my opinion, what the best leaders have in common is their atmosphere is one others want to be inside.

All you have to do, if you want everything in life from everybody else, is first pay attention. Listen to them. Show them respect. Give them meaning. Convey to them that they matter to you. But you have to go first.
Peter Kaufman

But you have to go first. You can't wait for someone else to set the atmosphere or do it without intentionality.

Starting Conditions

The most important three minutes of your day might be the 180 seconds you spend greeting your assistant, office manager, or the first person you see when you walk in.

If you rush past them, that's the atmosphere you carry into everything that follows. If you stop, make eye contact, and give them your genuine presence, even for a moment, that atmosphere carries forward too.

Starting conditions matter. Starting conditions matter. The way you begin an interaction often shapes everything that follows.

You're not just creating an atmosphere at work, your spouse is inside it, your kids are inside it and your internal dialogue is also creating an atmosphere that you live inside.

So when you walk in the door after a long day of work, which atmosphere are you bringing into your home? Is it constricting or is it expanding your home? Are your kids' eyes shining when you walk in the door or are they looking away because of the stress you're bringing home?

What Matters Most

Thirty years from now, when your daughter talks about you to your grandkids, she will not give two shits about your bottom line. She's going to describe what it felt like to grow up in the atmosphere you created.

When your best employee moves on and someone asks about the best leader they ever worked for, they're not going to talk about your strategic vision. They're going to talk about the air in the room when you were leading. How it felt to be in it. What it brought out in them. How they became more alive in it.

Business, like life, is all about how you make people feel. It's that simple, and it's that hard.
Danny Meyer